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Steps

by DannyMoney

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1.
Everywhere 03:52
I felt my friend’s look upon my face I was standing there, had his look there My brother who I’ve known since I was five Kinda sweet we’re both alive I felt him there, I feel him everywhere She looked better as a woman than she did as a kid Her arms were brown and giving and now we both forgive The lies that led us here to stand up on this bridge She held me there, she holds me everywhere Some of you I’ll see again, some of you I’ll not But as long as you remember nothing is forgot We carry pain religiously — we tarry at the edge But plunging in is what we do when we say we've got a friend I saw my friend’s face in the morning light We both agreed we were doing alright Wild dogs and kids running in the grass, Kinda sad to know this all will pass I felt him there, I feel him everywhere She knew it before me, as she often did Like water through my fingers the feeling slid Down to open rivers flowing out to sea She left me there, she leaves me everywhere Some of you I’ll see again, some of you I’ll not But as long as you remember nothing is forgot We struggle for an epiphany with each and every breath But what’s it for when we feel no more and we tremble before death? I felt it there, I feel it everywhere
2.
Girls annoy me, they destroy me When they don’t get back in touch Follow my schedule, do it on my time Act with reason act with rhyme I’m happy to have these things I have Books and CDs, movies and LPs Girls annoy me Joy eludes me, what’s the reason Could it be about my cock? And like a monk I say prayer, I just want to slay and dip Will I need that money another day? Is every buck I spend money thrown away? Joy annoys me So what is left? tick tock tick tock tick tock tick tock So what is left? tick tock tick tock tick tock tick — I can’t deny my unhappy feeling Like an onion cutting up I’m crying while my skin is ever-peeling Life annoys me, drop the big one Like a fart from Uncle Sam And in the wasteland, zero people And I can catch my breath cuz I’m good and dead And in the ether nothing annoys me Cuz all of that I’ve hated is good and gone And with these last words: girls annoy me But it’s nothing too specific, I’m just incel
3.
She's my little secret Won't tell about her yet I'll tell the world in time But for now she's just mine My little secret, the things she does... But I've been burned before — Don't wanna get hurt My secret could implode and everyone would know So everybody Cool your jets I'm still discovering My little secret She don't got nowhere to go when she's with me She helps to find my glasses when I can't see But can she detect, when she's far away That I so dread her leaving, which she just may My little secret I’ll keep her yet
4.
Four 40s and the truth A piece of ass in cowboy boots A studded belt through her loops The feral call of hungry youth I tip to her my cowboy hat She said to me, I like 'em fat We went to dance and that was that We drank 'em 40s and had a chat Well, lace your honey, tip ‘em back Sit your butt up in my lap Send her roses and all of that crap And if there's sweat in it, let it sweat But if regret's in it, don’t say a word to me about that Curlicue, she spun her yarn She lived on edge in a run-down barn Her life a sock she always had to darn But baby, no, life ain’t no riddle Just put your arm around my middle And kiss my neck to that wild, screeching fiddle Well, lace your honey, sip the sap Put your paw in that there trap Sing me fancies and all of that crap And if there's sweat in it, let it sweat But if regret's in it, don’t say a word to me about that Yes’m, I drive cars so fast Cuz nothing good is built to last We felt the town in darkness careening past "Why's it that we're leaving town? Don't you like my friends around?" I told her no, t'was time to go Last song’s The Beach Boy’s “Kokomo” Well, life is just a state of mind Hope you like it like I like mine Four 40s and the truth — Slip on out of your cowboy boots!
5.
Steps 04:32
When I’m happy, things are at their worst I know that I’m in trouble when I feel like I might burst When in the moment time is time gone past So heavy is the notion that this happiness won't last And yes indeed, I leave your arms With such despair it does me harm At night, I curse the devil moon That rock up in the heavens who has rocked me to my doom I am so eager, that I must confess That if the moon is full of blood it pulls me to duress Seems to me, I’ve run afoul Of wicked tides that make me howl And I can’t rely on my feet So I always blame ‘em, so I always blame ‘em And they never do leave So I always take ‘em, I have to take ‘em with me Here and there and I take myself everywhere Making each step this year lead me here Cuts and scrapes, there’s nothing known as “fair” I take my licks as if they’ve been delivered from the air We don’t deserve it, the harm that’s done to man Well, if we don’t deserve it god is lacking any plan So yes it’s true: pain is a map Step by step it leads me back And I can’t rely on my feet So I always blame ‘em, so I always blame ‘em And they never do leave So I always take ‘em, I have to take ‘em with me Here and there and I take myself everywhere Making each step this year lead me here
6.
Hopeful, TX 02:43
Hopeful, Texas — the town of my dreams Is so much further than it seems The play of light on a long dead screen Just winks at nothing, however it gleams And ever since her eyes done glinted My mind has had my ticket printed As what's in store had been more than hinted A world of pleasure to do my stint in How much longer must I wait? And the date on my ticket is set in the future Where deep down in Texas I touch down as suitor But she left me after all — she left in good humor When I bought my ticket I thought that I knew her Yes, in Hopeful, the joke's on me But maybe I'll get there eventually Or Potential, Montana or Grateful, Vermont Destination: I'm happy — for more than a jaunt
7.
What if I'm wrong? Been solid for so long But now I got this question And all at once I’m questing To connect with something real And trust I'm not alone Can I do better? For so long I've felt so strong But it’s been the empty gesture Of an overactive mind That left my soul bombarded And a quiet mind behind Can I go beyond? To trust to silence as to song? For faith I lack — I see too much I long for blindness, and for touch Would I wrestle with the devil To believe to see the light? Go past my past perceptions On fire in the night To question old beliefs And do what now feels right? Will I go beyond? To trust to silence as to song? For faith I lack — I see too much I long for blindness, and for touch To make me meek as snowy mountains Rooted deep, not to be moved I am free from hate cuz I know God is only love What if I'm wrong? What if I'm wrong?
8.
Lovesick 02:32
Sitting outside with her on my mind I'm always sick But I'm not sick of love Love is sick of me Hey old tree, are you just like me? How many of us have you seen? Too many to count, oh, that I bet Far too many lovesick I go through heartbreak before my heart breaks My heart breaks before my heart breaks Too many to count, oh, that I bet Far too many lovesick What’re all these people laughing at? I know that they must be blue But why the hell do I question that When I've been laughing, too? If my heart breaks before my heart breaks How will it feel when she tells me that we're through? Well, it's hard rent for me But she lives here rent free Toss a coin into the stream And I'm wishing always that she was here always I'm a wishing machine I go through heartbreak before my heart breaks I go through heartbreak before my heart breaks Too many to count, oh, that I bet Far too many lovesick Far too many lovesick...

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all songs written by DannyMoney
recorded on iPhone in Queens

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released September 11, 2022

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DannyMoney Queens, New York

older tunes linked below as DAN GRGAS

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